I remember

April 19, 2006

I remember brief moments, like photographs in my mind, each one of him. And as I look at the images, he’s opening the door and an enormous grin spreads across his face when he sees me standing there, I can hear him saying to me, “I’ll never leave”. Nothing makes me happier than that one image of him opening the door, knowing that I made him happy. It’s taken me a long time to understand he didn’t break his promise, he didn’t leave, he was taken. Taken too early. So now I just remember that smile, and that he was wearing his glasses when he opened the door, odd as he never wore his glasses, he’d just squint at things in an adorable way.


Airport Moments

March 29, 2006

I used to dream of having one of those great romantic moments – walking through the arrivals gate and seeing him standing there. There would be slow motion running, he'd pick me up and twirl me around so happy to see me again. In reality my airport moments have always been significantly more tearful than the daydreams…Sobbing so hard after leaving him that even the customs lady looked at my with pity, talking to him on the phone from airport after airport, wishing i was somewhere – anywhere – but in an airport.

That final airport day was never going to be a Hollywood moment, the closest it came was the stickers on my luggage from LAX Airport. I was tired, I was jetlagged, I was ready to be at home. It all seems a bit of a blur to be honest – after my years of waiting for that moment I can't remember who i hugged first, or the expression on his face as I came through the gate. The only thing I remember is the feeling of being back on the ground, and wishing i'd brushed my hair before i got off the plane.


March 24, 2006

“I’ve bought you a present” he announced with a secretive smile.

“Really? What kind of present?”

“First you have to close your eyes…then I’m going to give you things to taste”

I raised my eyebrows but grinned and closed my eyes.

“Ok, you have three choices, here’s option one…”

It was a bizarre taste, like eating three extra strong mints sprinkled with chalk. I must have made a face because he laughed.

“Ok, option two”

“Hey, I know what this one is!”

“Well, play along anyway, here’s option three.”

Definitely minty, but not chalky, no taste of the dreaded spearmint.

“Definitely option three” I said with a smile.

“Excellent. You can open your eyes now”

I looked down at the three tubes of toothpaste sitting on the table in front of me

“Any particular reason I’ve been tasting toothpaste?” I asked curiously.

“Well, if we’re going to move in together we’re going to have to agree on a toothpaste – it’s the grown up thing to do – you can’t always have two tubes of toothpaste by the sink, and now we have one we both like.”

“Was that you asking me to move in with you in a rather round about way?” I asked, the grin on my face growing rapidly.

He nodded, and I leant over to kiss him.

“You’re all toothpastey” he said, as we sat grinning at each other.

Words & Meanings

March 23, 2006

“When Tim and Jess asked me to speak at their wedding, there were specific warnings given – I was to limit the number of embarassing stories, and under no circumstances was I to produce photographic evidence of any embarassing events. Well, that’s pretty difficult when the groom is your twin brother, and the bride is your best friend. How could I resist mentioning the infamous night of the mohican?

However, I did promise, which got me thinking – what on earth is there to say? No one was more thrilled when these two got together, but I was just as shocked as everyone else. Tim who plans everything down to the letter, and on one occasion actually made me synchronise my watch with his, was dating, and now marrying, lovely Jess who once accidentally came to lectures in her pjyamas, and lives in a dream world even more than I do. They couldn’t be more different, but when it comes down to it, I think that’s what makes them so perfect for each other.

Tim’s favourite book growing up was the dictionary – we all know that he loves facts, and words with specific meanings, and in Jess he’s found the perfect way to complement that, for if anyone could be described as a thesaurus, it’s Jess. Tim had the words, and the meanings, and Jess the instinct to turn things around, look at things from another angle, or simply offer up a different word.”